Hello. Watch Your Step


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WHOA. It’s been awhile since I’ve been in this space. There is a seven inch layer of dust on EVERYTHING and I’m sorry about that. I will find you a place to sit as soon as possible. But I’m not going to stress out about that, because NOPE. You know that I love you even if things aren’t super hospitable around here right now. They will be. Pretty sure. As soon as I figure out what the hell I’m doing.

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I bought this pen pouch a couple of months ago because, well, because I have a sick obsession with office supplies and pens and all things for my bullet journal and I also love joy. SO. Yes. I bought the pouch of joy.

(Please note that I don’t actually call it that.)

But what I *am * saying is that I love it. It’s the perfect-ish size and it is a fabulous reminder of finding joy on the daily.

Which is why I am here.

I don’t exactly know what to do with all this space anymore but what I DO know is that I’m happiest when I put my joy here. Shit that makes me happy. People that make me happy. Beautiful things that make me happy. It’s going here. Because if there’s one thing we all need more of it’s JOY.

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This may look different for everyone.

(I don’t set fire to things. Almost never. But I do watch Pitch Perfect whenever I can.)

But…joy. That’s what’s happening here.

And since Sarah and I sat down and talked about our love for all things Kimmy Schmidt for Cap City Moms this week, I feel like that should start us off. Because Titus and Kimmy 4EVER. Sarah and I have been known to have gif-offs with each other on messenger or hangouts and what I will tell you is this: These ridiculous message of gifs BRING ME JOY. Which is the damn point of all of this.

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Joy. Get it.

Wake Me Up When September Ends

September felt like THE longest month that also completely sped by at lightening speed. I don’t know how that is mathematically possible, but it probably has everything to do with all those common core shenanigans.    

decisions

My hosting fees are due over here. I mean…like, I’m already on borrowed time and I’m conflicted about what to do.

When I’m trying to figure stuff out, I generally write about it. So here we go.

I like having my own space on the interwebs. Cap City Moms has my heart, but this place is just for, well…me. I’m completely lame over here. Precious few people make the trek over here because I don’t actually post over here much anymore. You would think that would make things easy. I don’t use it…I shouldn’t waste my money.

And yet…I haven’t been able to trash it all and walk away.

This was the first place where I was me. I was a closet blogger until I made the jump over here and owned my voice. A little. Mostly. I put myself out there more. Learned how to come out of my shell in the smallest of increments. I still have a looooooong way to go. Which is probably why I can’t seem to say goodbye to Life of Jill.

I don’t think I’m ready to give this up.

Is that silly? Frivilous? Maybe.

And now I’ve talked myself out of it again. Is it worth the money? Is it just one more thing on the to-do list and another something to make me feel guilty? I’m…just not sure. Ugh.

I think I’m more confused and conflicted than I was before I started this post.

So…apparently I’m still deciding. I’ll let you know.

The Luckiest

It’s easy to celebrate this guy. 

It’s no secret, we were young and dumb when we got married. I have no idea how the two of us made it to the couple we are today. Of course hard work and perseverance and, yeah…stubbornness. But we are so lucky. 

Even after all these years, I’m amazed by how much he loves and works so hard for our family. He’s my partner in crime…and I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Happy Father’s Day, babe. 

   

Memory Lane

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My kitchen table is covered in crown making materials for their senior rally tomorrow. I’m not entirely positive that I’m NOT high from all the spray paint smells. I honestly can’t be sure at this point. Mostly because I’m already so, so tired.

We’re also watching Mr & Mrs Smith. Because that’s what you do when you’re up all night working on senior crowns.

 


 

I’ve spent so much time looking at pictures from the past couple months, thanks to Sarah. Besides (AMAZING) senior portraits, she’s also managed to capture some of THE BEST moments of the end of Beezus’ senior year. I love scrolling through them. Basically, that’s all I’ve done for the past few months.

Okay, not ALL that I’ve done.

But YOU GUYS.

I love these turds
I love these turds

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Ooooph. My heart.
Ooooph. My heart.

I just really love these goofs.

And I’m just kinda gonna miss all of the things.

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Senior Ball
Senior Ball

We all know that Sarah is a genius, but I don’t think anyone will ever understand how much I love these pictures. Like, I’m super close to being SUPER dramatic about all of it and telling you how they made my life. MADE. MY. LIFE. But I’m not going to do that. Yet.

Even though you all would agree with me. Because come ON with these.

Sutro Baths
Sutro Baths

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But wait, there’s more.

Because then there are family pictures. Family pictures that (yes, as dramatic as it sounds) literally took my breath away. Family pictures that will be on huge canvases in my house because I WILL BE THAT PERSON.

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By THAT PERSON I mean completely awesome and rad. Because LOOK.

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I think this one will be OBNOXIOUSLY huge in my front room. Because YES.
But it was this one that stopped me in my tracks. Because these are my babies who aren’t babies. This is a beautiful GORGEOUS picture of my daughters that is so them in some way. The essence? Of them? I CAN’T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT EITHER.

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It’s 1 in the morning and there are still so many crowns to be made for tomorrow. We just made a midnight run to In n Out, and I already have too many regrets to count.

I’m also legitimately worried about all that they have to do. But not worried enough that I’ve offered to help. I mean, besides driving to In n Out. But…helping? Ugh. Naw.

(I’ll probably help for a minute. I’m a such a sucker.)

 

**I love you, Sarah. Thank you isn’t even enough. But thank you.**

Learn By Doing

I actually starting writing about our trip on the drive home. I’m not entirely sure why I didn’t finish, but it is what it is. I know a lot of it has to do with feeling like I’m a broken record. I just imagine what everyone must think every time graduation and college comes up. It sounds a lot like “shut up already” I’m sure.

Eh. Again…it is what it is.

But this trip to SLO.

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Most of you have heard me mention how good this trip was. Visiting the campus, the community…seeing my kid make some new friends and experiencing new things with other (new) students with the same focus and major. Getting a better idea of where she’ll be living for the next few years. Exploring. She stayed one night in the dorms for a special open house event.

While she did that, The Dude and I explored the surrounding area. Only 15 minutes to the beach and Pismo. Wineries close by for when we visit.

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The Farmer’s Market. Really seeing how good this will all be for her and how much fun she’s going to have.

It was everything I needed Open House to be.

Gawd, she’s going to have the best time.

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I have no effing clue how I’m ever going to say goodbye to that kid in the fall. But getting just a taste of the amazing campus and community life and her immediately loving it helps so damn much.

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Cal Poly won’t ever be the same after she comes to town. How could it?

She leaves an indelible mark wherever she goes.

In the best possible way.

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Oh, The Places You’ll Go



We have two graduating seniors in our family so we had a “Oh, the Places You’ll Go” party last night. Naturally. 

I mean, it was really just a contest to see who could keep it together the longest but with presents for the grads, so… 

This is all new territory in some ways. It’s pretty exciting and crazy and weird. It’s also hard. 

But we’re getting there. 

Jar of Dirt



There’s a tradition for graduating seniors at the end of the season: jars are filled with the dirt or grass (or both) from the spot on the field where they played. So this is the dirt from the spot between second base and third base where my kid played shortstop for the past four years. Varsity all four years, team captain, All League…all of this, and more, while completing a full IB diploma, managing a student team in a nationally recognized environmental creek project and maintaining a 4.4 GPA…that’s some damn meaningful dirt in a mason jar. 

I didn’t cry during senior night or prom but hand my kid a jar of dirt (and say a bunch of nice things about how rad she is) during the end of season party tonight and I can no longer make such bold statements. Turns out there IS crying in baseball. I mean softball. (I’m so proud of you, kiddo. <3)





April Stuff and Stuff



April was INSANE. Awesome, but completely nuts. I have no idea how we crammed so much into one month. Birthdays, baby showers, more birthdays, Easter (remember Easter?) Sports-a-Rama, college trips…Einstein. Dude. And that’s not even the half of it. 

Also, how is it almost May?! (Gulp)

Post It Notes and Flowers

I’ve been going to bed pretty late the last few days. Nothing about this surprises you, I’m sure. But it’s been especially late the last couple of nights as we’ve been helping the kids with some school things. 

Last night, as I half stumbled half walked to my bed, I noticed a little something that Ramona had left me. 

I’m not sure what we did that was awesome, but she had left a similar note for The Dude on his side of the bed. (I’m the only one who got flowers, but that makes perfect sense. DUH.)

For two seconds I wondered what she might’ve done. We’re these covert “I’m sorry” flowers? Am I gonna get a phone call later? 

Hopefully not. 

At any rate, it was adorable and wonderful and a perfect pick-me-up after a really (REALLY) long day. I can’t even worry about a possible phone call. This time.