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Passed the point of delirium


I’m finally (FINALLY) done with jury duty. The trial isn’t actually over as of yet so I should be shutting up about pretty much everything. But being an alternate, I am not part of deliberation. And as glad as I am that it is over, I’m a tiny bit frustrated to not see it through. I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS. What’s the end of the story and all that?

I’m actually going to be good and not say a word about how I would’ve voted. You know, to avoid jail time. FOR NOW. It just seems like a good idea.

Okay, I’m not exactly sure if I could get jail time but just stop trying to get me to say something. You’re a bad influence. Stop trying to send me to jail.

I have big plans for life after jury duty. I fully intend on NOT driving 30 minutes in the OPPOSITE direction of work and regular life to get to the courthouse. I plan on NOT listening to arrogant council plead their case. I’m AM going avoid listening to strangers and their dirty laundry. (Soooooo Awkward.) I am also going to remember how grateful I am for my family because OH MY HELL YOU GUYS.

* * *

I feel like I’ve been complaining so much about jury duty, my ouchie mouth…too much going on, not feeling well, etc. I mean, jury duty just begs for complaining. Dental work, same. NOT BEING ABLE TO EAT WHAT YOU LIKE, duh. But I also know how lucky I am. I’m grateful I have access to a dentist and insurance to get this all fixed. I’m grateful for a legal system that handles such things. I’m grateful I get the weekend off to chill out and rest.

But to make up for all the complaining, here’s Paisley.

She's the best
She’s the best

She likes you. And she thinks your hair looks nice.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

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Jury Duty

There must be something about me or my information that just BEGS to be summoned for jury duty. My personal data must be like the civic duty kick me sign that I unwittingly wear so proudly for all court clerks to see. Don’t be jealous, but I am summoned for jury duty, like clockwork, every two years. Sometimes even 18 months when those court clerk computers are feeling especially kicky.

I’ve only served on two trials, but that’s two more than most people I know.

Surely I’ve just jinxed myself. I’m sitting in a stairwell as they call potential jurors. If I erase that sentence will I be dismissed without question?

Side Note: I just saw a woman carrying The Goldfinch. Excellent choice for a long day of waiting.

* * *

It’s been 12 hours since I wrote the beginning of this post. I’m a ginormous idiot. Yes of course I was chosen AT THE VERY LAST MINUTE to be an alternate on a 3-ish week case. YOU KNEW THAT WAS COMING.

I’m trying to look at the silver lining but I just spent a Thursday stuck in a courtroom AND THEN the radiator in my car busted. ::sob:: (I can’t make this shit up, folks.)

But my super-hero husband fixed the radiator and I’m trying to rearrange my life to accommodate jury duty, etc.

(He wins, though. I mean FIXED RADIATOR YOU GUYS.)

At least the courthouse is lovely
At least the courthouse is lovely

My goal for tomorrow is to not fall asleep during opening arguments and to not inflict bodily harm to anyone that is being an idiot. (That’s frowned upon in a courtroom…even if they deserve it.)

I’m also going to try and find a better attitude before walking into the super ancient courthouse. I’m not entirely sure this will happen, but it makes me feel good about myself that I’m even trying. Everything. Will. Be. Okay

Happy Friday everyone…wish me luck!