grim, grinning ghosts come out to socialize

photo: mine
photo: mine

My family is so good at going to Disneyland. Not because we’re geniuses or anything, we have just learned over the years what works for us and how we’ve even learned how to have an amazing time without breaking the bank. You would think we would’ve grown out of it by now, but my kids are 16 and 11 and still want to go to Disneyland on all our vacations. All of them.

Sorry, Hawaii or Mexico. You’re just not good enough.

There is something about Disneyland that zaps the four of us into the best versions of ourselves-all at the same time. Even when we travel with friends or meet up with some of our favorite people. We have our Disney plans down to a science, so we know how to ride our favorite rides and see our favorite things pretty efficiently. We find that we have tons of patience for crowds and waiting. (Miracles!) And, somehow, we all just go with the flow and let the fun and excitement dictate how we spend our day.

Truth be told, we love going to Disneyland any time of the year. Summer? A blast. Thanksgiving and Christmas? Ridiculously magical. (Yes, I just said magical. I’m sorry. But you have to know the truth IT SNOWS ON MAIN STREET.)

disney_halloween-time-01-full
photo credit: disney

For years we’ve talked about going to Disneyland during the Halloween season. We’ve had many conversations about wishing we could go when the park is “dressed up” for spooking. But this is where I admit that I had no idea how amazingly cool Disneyland is for Halloween. And it’s even cooler this year.

  • The Halloween season made its appearance just this past Friday (Friday the 13th, man.) and stays until Halloween. New this year: special Halloween décor at the Mad Tea Party in California Adventure.
  • Mickey’s Halloween Party: 13 nights of magical Halloween partying with Mickey. A separate ticket after-hours event for you and your family to celebrate Halloween and trick or treat with your favorite Disney characters. Your event ticket gets you in to the park up to three hours before the event, so you and your family can enjoy the park before celebrating with Mickey. Tickets sell out fast, so get your tickets early. For more information on the specific 13 dates, click on over here.
  • Monsters U Dance Party: new this year, a dance party with your favorite Monsters University students. It has been described as a “family friendly frat party” but if Mike and Sully show up in togas, I’m just not sure what to think.
  • Rides and attractions also “dress up for Halloween. The Haunted Mansion is a mix of Halloween and Christmas a la Nightmare Before Christmas. Space Mountain transforms into Space Mountain Ghost Galaxy. (AWESOME.)
disney_halloween-time-00-full
photo credit: disney

What half of my kids don’t know yet, and why I’ve waited a little bit to say anything, is that the four of us are heading the Happiest (Spookiest) Place on Earth next weekend to check out Mickey’s Halloween Party. Like, next Friday kind of next week. I’m so giddy I can’t stand it. I’m also probably super annoying and I’M SORRY. This was just one of those things that has been on our radar for so long, I just can’t help how excited I am. And part of that is because I’m so excited to surprise that Ramona kid of mine. She’s been working so hard, I can’t wait to see (and probably video) her reaction when she realizes where we’re going. I’m a little bit bummed that we couldn’t surprise Beezus, but sometimes juniors in high school can’t be surprised by trips somewhere if they’re missing a day of school. (LAME, I know.)

I’m probably a little more excited than I should be to see some of the Disney villains take the stage. It’s not very often they get to be the center of attention, and I’m super excited to see them out and about a lot more. Hopefully my kids feel the same way because I kinda want to get a picture with as many as I possibly can. No seriously. I mean COME ON…Maleficent OUT IN THE WILD PARK.

I might not be able to sleep this week.

 

My family and I have been given tickets to Mickey’s Halloween Party and Disney park. All opinions are my own.

it’s a venti kind of Thursday

Every Monday and Wednesday, my husband (The Dude) teaches an evening class at a nearby college. I know! Our life isn’t busy enough so we threw another mound of crap on an already very full plate. But what started out as a work “I think you should do this” thing turned into “hey we could totally pay off this bill” thing. We obviously talked a lot about this before fully committing to it and decided we would try it out for a semester. And yes, I said “WE”. My Mondays and Wednesdays are now a whole lot more insane.

And they were pretty insane before.

I think since we live in a pretty constant state of busy, it’s almost like we don’t even notice when we throw another log on the busy fire. However, this week saw us have MANY scheduling conflicts and overbookings for things that were already scheduled way in advance. Which is fine. Sorta. It’s just that I am asking for help even when it’s hard to do so.

Yesterday was especially nutty. Luckily, my mom had Ramona and could hang out with her later than normal. I had gotten a ride for Beezus from her water polo game to softball practice (because logistics were impossible unless I only worked a half day) but I still needed to get her softball bag to her after leaving the office. Maybe it was lucky that we both got a little stuck in traffic, because that way we ended up at practice at the same time. As I called out my goodbye as she traded one backpack for another, I said “Hey! I’ll probably be late!” My response when she asked why? “Because my life is insane! And so is yours! Yay!” (I did have a smile on my face. Just thought I’d put that out there. It might have been an ironic, sarcastic type of smile.)

I took all the back roads as I headed home to try and avoid some of the traffic. Quick phone call to touch bases with Sarah on some important FP updates. Sang at the top of my lungs when I needed to. Pulled up to my house, knowing I would be leaving again in 15 minutes. My brother was there dropping off a chair (because, duh…doesn’t your brother drop off chairs on Wednesdays?) so a quick hello and an equally quick goodbye, and my mom (Ramona) and I were off to a family-type meeting regarding my brother’s wedding next month. A meeting I should’ve only stayed at for 20 minutes because Beezus would be done with practice soon. However, it was rather hard to leave right in the middle of plan stuffs.

So I asked for help. Again.

Wonderfully and thankfully for me, my dear friend (and another parent from the softball team) could cover for me. I was able to text everyone involved and soon enough, Beezus had a ride to their house while they waited for me to finish up. I didn’t stay too much longer, though. Just long enough for my sister in-law to call me Miss Perfect and long enough for me to be super sarcastic and crack jokes to people I didn’t know very well. (Totes normal!)

As I picked up Beezus from my sweet friend’s house, she said it sounded like the next few weeks were pretty crazy. I said yeah. She asked what she could do for me. (I love her.) I said, “Uh…THIS. This helped me a ton! Taking my child home with you saved the day.”

And then I said what I always seem to say:

I just need to get through September.”

But of course, I’m an idiot and wasn’t thinking about the aforementioned wedding next month.

“Uh. Just kidding. I just need to get through October.”

I know full well that I’ll be saying the very same thing in November and December. (Holidays. Duh.) But, for right now? Getting through the next 4-5 weeks is all I can focus on.

Now, you would think that our story would end with us heading home after that. But it doesn’t. Yes, we are as insane as you think we are, but we have family visiting from out of town (out of the country, really) and so we popped over to my in-laws to say hello while The Dude met us there. We only stayed for an hour, though…the kids had to get to bed. And I had to start a load of laundry because I really wasn’t sure what the clean underwear situation was. (Ahem. It was good I did laundry.)

Tonight doesn’t look a whole lot different, but I won’t make myself look more insane by telling you about that too. At least there is a lot less driving tonight, The Dude isn’t teaching, and I probably won’t have to start a load of clothes when I get home. However, I really should do the dishes that are beginning to pile up in the sink just in case we have company tonight after the family attends Beezus’ double-header softball games.

I’m terrible at not telling you things.

I also REALLY deserve this venti iced coffee.

venti

Ramona the Brave

I cannot believe the difference in Ramona the past couple of weeks. I mean, they are subtle differences, but I can see the changes in her every day. I’m grateful that she’s doing better. I love that she loves certain parts of school. I’m relieved…well, I’m relieved that she doesn’t hate life.

thumbs up, baby
thumbs up, baby

She’s making friends. She’s enjoying school more and more. At least most parts of school. Homework and test taking are a struggle in a couple of her classes, but we’re working on that. We’re trying to figure out what works for her. I haven’t said anything, but I’ve been wondering about a slight learning disability and maybe even some sensory issues that I didn’t realize before. I’m not get into that right now, but she works so hard studying and yet struggles so hard on her tests and quizzes. I’m not quite ready to give her a label. I’m also not sure that I’m right. But let’s just say that this mama is working on doing a lot of research to understand the way she learns. (For the record, I still have don’t really know.)

What I do know? She loves band. LOVES it. I had no idea that she would take to it so well. She’s playing the flute and can play Mary Had a Little Lamb like a BOSS. Her close friends have come from meeting them in band class. I even got to meet one of their moms at last week’s school event. Which makes me feel like we’re actually getting to be part of the community. (Bonus!) And these friends seem so nice! Like, really nice! I’m almost afraid to say it out loud, but no drama! (4th and 5th grade was fraught with drama. It was not my favorite.) She is thriving and absolutely adores her band teacher.

firstdayofsixthgrade

Last week my dear child got in trouble for her attitude and then grounded from her iPod and TV. Quite honestly, it’s the best thing that ever happened to her. I think she’s sleeping better. She’s not as distracted. She’s reading more. I’m not saying it solved all our problems, but my goodness she’s different without those two things. The Dude didn’t give her a time period of how long she’d be without the iPod and TV privilege. I don’t know how or when we’ll even start talking about it. But for now? It’s better for her not to have constant and easy access to them. It’s almost like her mind is at peace without them.

And in completely unrelated news, she got her very own razor this past weekend. Yeah…leg shaving milestone. Leg. Shaving. Milestone. Super not ready for that. I mean, she spent the day wanting everyone to feel her legs so that helped to bring things back a little bit, but yeah. These kids of mine are making me feel old.

Of course, it just took me several (SEVERAL!!) tries to spell “subtle” in that sentence up there so who knows? Maybe I’m just getting old all on my own. Looking into convalescent homes is next on my to-do list. Because of course.

a delicious night with Tillamook

You know what? I get it. Talking about cheese and yogurt and ice cream is, well…I guess it could be kinda odd. Except when it’s not. Like when you sit down with other area bloggers and talk cheese with some of the coolest people in the business. I’m sorry, but that’s when talking about cheese is super, super cool. (Actually, there was very little cheese discussion. It was mostly ice cream talk. Let’s be honest.)

tillamook sign

Last week, I had the pleasure of joining other Sac Bloggers for a Tillamook Ice Cream Social Event. And nothing says “ice cream social” like putting a social media spin on the evening. Or maybe I just find it awesome that Tillamook put a social media spin on an ice cream social. Either way, social media is so much more delicious when there is an ice cream social involved. Especially if the ice cream is Tillamook.

I think. I’m not even sure what I just said.

The lovely and talented Gillian gave us a brilliant overview on how to make social media work for us. Our “Visual Voice” in the internet and social media world and how we can use that to develop our brand and our stories and our visual presence on line. Did I mention she was brilliant?

Stephanie and I may have wanted to take the baby bus for a joyride.
Stephanie and I may have wanted to take the baby bus for a joyride.

I’ve made no secret about the fact that I love Tillamook. My family is maybe even more obsessed than I am. (Okay, there’s no maybe…they really are obsessed. And maybe threatened my life if I didn’t bring home yogurt from the event.) But one of the things I love most about Tillamook is the relationship they build with their consumers. I mean, c’mon…they know they they’re a company that makes and sells cheese. (Delicious cheese, of course.) But more than just cheese is the history of dairy farmers and creameries and the commitment to quality they made over 100 years ago. They have always been owned and operated by those that “work the soil” and “milk the cows” and who know the business best. But the community that they have built and nurtured is pretty fantastic. Tillamook doesn’t just care about selling you cheese, they love to be a part of that experience. And, yeah…I keep joking about cheese. But obviously cheese is just the jumping off point.

Because have I mentioned ice cream?

YUM. Also, YUM. (My favorite.)
YUM. Also, YUM. (My favorite.)

At the end of the evening, we all had a chance to make an amazing ice cream sandwiches out of the delicious Tillamook ice cream. The best “stylized” and best Instagramed picture of the ice cream sandwiches would be chosen. I was a little concerned about my sandwich melting. I took a picture, sure…but found it much more important to eat the darn thing. (I didn’t win. Clearly.) (I didn’t care. Clearly.)

tillamook emptyplate

I obviously had a wonderful evening. I got to hang out with some of my favorite people…I learned a lot…I ate way too much ice cream. My kids were so jealous that I got to hang out with Gillian and Katie from Tillamook that I kinda felt bad that I didn’t arrange for my own private ice cream social. Not that my family deserves their own event, but…when your 16 year old kid is so disappointed that she didn’t get to see them she started stalking following them on Instagram in a totally non-scary way? Well, I guess that means you need to admit that your yogurt addiction is worse than you thought.

 

 

A huge thank you to Tillamook, SodaPop PR and Sacramento Bloggers!

Our College Bucket List

For the past four or five months, I’ve been compiling a list. A bucket list of sorts. But it is all about things I want to do before Beezus goes to college. (Also, I just went and counted. I haven’t had a sunrise/sunset, talked about college moment in eight posts. I’m not saying it’s a record, I’m just saying it’s an improvement.) I spent a LOT of hours working in an office when she was younger and missed A LOT of important (to me) events. Let’s just say that creating a College Bucket List is a way for me to focus on what I CAN do before she’s off to college instead of what I can’t go back and change.

And listen. I know that sending kids off to college isn’t hard for everyone. Or maybe other people just handle it better than I ever will. But I have LOVED making this list. I don’t want to be holding on to regrets when I’m already having a hard time letting go. And YES, some of these trips will have to be when she’s home from college on summer break, but let me pretend I can get this all done in a year and a half.

college bucket listI will probably revise this as we go, but I love that I already have things scheduled or at least know the time frame that some of these things will happen. I guess, like many things in my life, if I have a “TO DO” list, or a plan, it almost feels like it’s all going to be ok. I mean, I’ll still be a weeping mess once the day arrives, but I feel a little less out of control. I feel like these are going to make some pretty damn awesome memories that we’ll all remember.

I have a few things coming up that I’m super excited to talk about. And putting this list together and on the blog helps me to be even more excited about all of it.

sometimes this is what our evenings look like

Yesterday I left work around 5:45. I was already running late to pick up Beezus from school and water polo practice when she called me.

“Um…do you have my softball bag?”

“Uh…no. Did you put it in my car?”

“Um…no. Ok. I’ll just tell coach that I’ll be late to batting practice so we can go home and get it.”

“Can’t you just use someone else’s bat?”

“MOM.”

“Beezus.”

(Exasperated sigh from both of us.)

We don’t live close to her school. We live slightly closer to where batting practice was, but driving ALL the way home and then basically ALL the way back wasn’t going to work for me. I was already solo-parenting it last night. Dropping Beezus off late would’ve made me late getting home for Ramona when my parents dropped her off.

I have nothing planned for dinner. I also don’t have much to make into dinner.

Being sick all last week has put me behind on all household things. Although, my house is pretty clean, thank you husband and my short breaks from feeling poopy.

(I still don’t feel all that great. But at least I’m better than I was.)

Ramona still had homework to do when she got home. I worry about her getting it done and still getting to bed on time.

Feed the dog. Clean up…after the dog.

Husband, thankfully, was able to pick up Beezus from batting practice, but I was already in the car and a quarter of the way there when he called. (I had no problem making THAT U-turn to head back home.)

Help Ramona with her homework. Remind Ramona that she needs to finish homework and hurry to bed because it’s getting late.

Laundry. Damn. That should’ve been started hours ago. I rushed to get that going. OH BUT WAIT. I forgot that I washed towels two days ago. So, yeah…THOSE need to be washed again.

Do we have anything for lunches? NO. No we do not. So to the grocery story I go. At 10 o’clock at night. Knowing that I have to be up at 4:30 to help get Beezus and The Dude out the door by 5am. (Tuesday mornings at our house suck eggs, y’all.) (The Dude offered to go to the store. But helping with high school math is way harder than a grocery store trip. I made him stay home.)

groceries

I try to not feel guilty that I toss crap like Uncrustables in my cart. Sure, PB&J are the easiest sandwiches in the world to make…but let’s go ahead and make it easier on Jill because I’M STILL NOT DONE WITH OTHER SHIT ONCE I GET HOME FROM THE GROCERY STORE. There’s lots of other good and healthy food in my cart, so I try to make myself feel better. Except…what is my family going to eat for dinner tomorrow while I’m gone at an event? Probably should grab something for them…

Get home and start the load of laundry that I needed to start HOURS ago. Put those pesky towels in the dryer.

Put away groceries. Stopped feeling bad about Uncrustables when I think about how all lunches are practically made.

Send some emails that I meant to send hours ago. Love that emails can be sent so late.

Put clothes in the dryer.

Head to bed. Pretend that I’m going to bed at 9 and not midnight. Laugh at earlier in the day when I thought I might be able to go to bed early.

Remind myself to be grateful that not all nights are like this.

all it takes is faith and trust…oh, and something I forgot: dust

I haven’t been running much lately. Or at all, really. But it makes me feel better if I can say it the other way. I mean, I do realize life has been insane. We’re always on the go. I don’t even get enough sleep usually. So finding time to run hasn’t made the agenda for a while.

We don’t need to talk about how my waistline notices the lack of running. No need to state the obvious! But it’s the mental and, dare I say, spiritual side of running that I miss most of all.

Also: Races.

I miss the races.

I’ve seen several people talking about this past weekend’s Disneyland Half Marathon. And I’m surprised by how much it made me wish I was, well…regularly running, but also that I was running through Disneyland like so many people I know. You guys…it really is so much fun. Like, more fun than I ever expected.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve always loved all things Disney. I just never though that Disney races would be so rad.

When Sarah asked told me that I would be running the Tinkerbell Half with her for her first half marathon, I was excited. (She feels bad because she didn’t give me much choice. I said: BRING IT.)

FOR THE RECORD: While I had been thinking of chopping off all of my hair for several months, I may or may not have taken the plunge just before our trip because DUH. Pixie haircut for the Tinkerbell Half.

 

see? adorable
see? adorable

Adorable.

Disney races start early. Don’t let anyone tell you different, because they’re lying. They gotta get all those runners through the park and still be able to open on time. But the best part of starting a race so early, in January, in Socal and at Disneyland?

FIREWORKS AT THE STARTING LINE.

Because of course.

Also, SoCal January is different than most other places in January, so the weather is nice. A little chilly at 4-something in the morning, but not bad at all.

tink (peter n wendy)

The beginning of the half marathon is through Downtown Disney and you make your way back to run through California Adventure and Disneyland. There are photo ops with several Disney characters all along the route while inside the park. Some stops had hefty lines, so you have to care more about getting the picture with than about how long it will take you to finish the race. Since this race is all about Tink, we wanted to stop to take pictures with Wendy & Peter and then again with the Lost Boys. Obviously. We decided against stopping for pictures with the princesses and other awesome characters because WOW the lines. The longest line we saw? Pictures with Storm Troopers. Plastic soldier men are the BUSINESS. Apparently.

the lost boys? HILARIOUS.
the lost boys? HILARIOUS.

Running through the park is a blast, though. Everything is lit up and just as awesome as you might think. And, because it’s Disneyland, there are people everywhere to help. Like, point you to the nearest bathroom. Or show your where the nearest garbage can is for your empty GU pouches…or they might throw it away for you. (That maybe happened.) (Disney isn’t ridiculously clean by accident.) You also run through some of the “back lots” where you see where they keep the floats and the stables where they keep the horses. It’s no Main Street “magic” but it is really interesting. Now, yes…running around Anaheim is a tiny bit boring, but many races have spots like that. The start and finish lines really make up for it.

I’ll be honest, I was a little lost in my excitement for Sarah at the end of her first half, so I feel like I missed some of what the Finish line had to offer. I still remember my first half and how I felt at the end of it. And I think I got lost in all that. But who doesn’t love an awesome Tinkerbell finishers medal? And a goody bag filled with post-race snacks? But mostly, who doesn’t love that end-of-race glow? (Just kidding, it’s all sweat and grossness. I’m not one of those people who finish a race looking all fresh and looking great. Nope. Although, this is the ONE race that I put on some serious make-up for.)

FINISHED!
FINISHED!

Here’s the thing…I just saw that next year’s Tinkerbell Half is about 85% full and it’s REALLY hard to not to sign us up again. It’s one of those things that is ON MY LIST to do with my girls before a certain one of them leaves for college. (Hysterical weeping.) And there are many of us have talked about doing this, too. So this is what I’m thinking: Tinkerbell Half Marathon 2015. Registration will open NEXT summer (July, I believe) and I think we should all do it. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

Put it on your calendars.

You don’t even have to start training for it until the end of next year.

Best. Idea. Ever.

Happening.

 

 

(Um…thank you for the pictures, Sarah!)

no rest for the insane

midnightmadness

There’s something about an “all hours of the day/night” Labor Day weekend softball tournament that makes you question everything about letting your child play competitive sports. Because I’m not joking. I really meant ALL. HOURS. OF THE NIGHT. And it’s the reason why I’m not sure that I’ll ever catch up on sleep or ever feel human again. It’s also the reason I just found 17 typos in just this first paragraph alone.

For the record, I love my children. I love to support them in all that they do. But since even Beezus hates this tournament, I don’t feel bad telling you how much I hate it, too.

Just to give you a visual that you don’t want, the tournament starts Friday night. Beezus’ first game wasn’t until 10:30 Saturday morning. The next game? Not until 2am Sunday morning. And then another game at 5:30 am. The next game times depend on brackets and game scores, so we didn’t find out until later Sunday afternoon that the next games would be at 10:30pm…and then the winner of that game (which was my kid’s team) would advance to the next round. That particular game would start sometime around 12:30 or 1 in the morning. (And? Let’s be honest…we were a little glad they didn’t win that game because the Championship game was scheduled to START at 5am Monday morning. Ugh.)

Sounds fun, right?

After that first game Saturday morning, I spent most of the afternoon getting a few things done while making sure that Beezus gets enough rest. I also made arrangements for Ramona to stay the night somewhere so that I could go to the Saturday night/Sunday morning games. There wasn’t really time for me to sleep because, well, because that’s part of being a parent. There are still things that have to be done even if I know I won’t be getting much sleep.

And I didn’t.

At all.

All weekend.

But I will tell you that there are some benefits of being sleep deprived. Well, there are benefits to choosing to hang out with your kid instead of catching a few hours of sleep.

After the (very early) Sunday morning games, Beezus and I head out in search of waffles. And…probably Eggs Benedict. Because DUH EGGS BENEDICT. I had no idea how I was going to stay awake for this breakfast, but it was one of those times where there was no way in hell I was saying no. Sleep deprived hilarity ensued, but it was so much fun to have an early morning date with this kid. We may have been laughing so hard that nearly the entire restaurant turned to look, but that might’ve been my imagination.

my early morning breakfast date
my early morning breakfast date

Now, because my kid burns thousands of calories a day with water polo and softball…and just regular life, I don’t mind telling your that she pretty much hoovered all the food in front of her. I’ve never, ever seen her be the boss of breakfast. But that’s a title she now has. She took no prisoners and showed no mercy. But the best part was as she took the last bite, she embraced her inner rock star diva.

tweet
But not only does she drop her fork like a boss, she says out loud:

“And THAT’S how you do it.”

breakfastboss2
I almost expected her to add “bitches” to the end of that sentence. But she refrained.

Clearly she’s a better person than I am.

saying goodbye to a really long week

I have written several paragraphs for a few different blog posts that I can’t seem to grab on to. I think this one is my fourth try. (Apparently the third time is NOT the charm. I’ll speak to someone about this.) I know I’m exhausted, so that doesn’t help. I feel like this week has been painfully long. Beezus is stressed about school schedules and making the right choices leading up to her senior year. Ramona is completely overwhelmed by all things middle school and doesn’t feel well at all. The Dude and I are pretending we know what the hell we’re doing, but I’m pretty sure you all know that we don’t. Much like most parents, I would guess.

We all seem to fly by the seat of our pants. I think that’s the only way to survive this parenting gig.

But here’s what I do know: THREE DAY WEEKEND.

It’s so needed around these parts. Even if there’s an insane softball tournament for part of the next few days, I feel like 3 days of weekend seems like a glorious idea. There are a few fun things coming up in the next few weeks, so I hope to get back into the swing of things this weekend.

In case you missed it, I wrote about how gross our house kinda was when we bought it. And then I also wrote about the paint colors and new carpet that made it all better.

I also wrote about being a little more me and getting comfortable with people knowing that I have a (gasp!) blog.

But most importantly, I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!!

cropped-LoJ_avatar1.jpg

being a little more me…

fears

There are many (MANY) people in my “real life” that don’t know I have a blog. For the record, I hate the term “real life” because this blog is part of my REAL LIFE, but you get what I’m trying to say. There are friends that I’ve had for years that don’t know that I have a piece of internet real estate right here. There are family members that don’t know a thing about this. And I don’t know how to handle the possibility that they will.

I blog semi-anonymously. Mostly because of someone’s job, but also because I think I’m fairly protective of my on-line presence. I mean, I use MY real name. And my dog’s really name. But no one else’s. (Unless you have a blog of your own. Then all bets are off.) I usually don’t remember I’m a control freak. Until something like putting my website link on my Instagram account made me break out in a cold sweat. Because there are people in my life that follow me on IG that don’t know I have a blog. I like all of those people. What the hell is my problem?

photo 2

So then I try to remember why I even started writing and blogging in the first place. Because I had something to say. A story to tell. Words to share. I love reading other blogs because I’m fascinated by other people and their stories. I love creativity. I love learning. Why couldn’t it be possible that someone feels that way about what I’ve got going on here? (I’m not saying they do or they don’t. But the possibility is there. I think.)

photo 1

I feel like an asshole even writing this, but if I’m going to be honest…well, I’m going to have to be honest about this too.

Which also includes telling myself how stupid I’m being:

If any person I know in real life asked about any post that I wrote, I would be honest with them. Things they might learn about me that they might not know? I’m a mess when I think about my kid going off to college. I have bad days/weeks/months. I meet and work with some awesome people in this crazy internet world. I worry about my kids starting new schools. I love that damn dog more than I (sometimes) let on. I was a teen mom/college dropout. I love my family more than anything. Campfire Wednesday is my new favorite thing. I’m a hot mess when I think about my kid going off to college. (Yes, it deserves to be on the list twice.)

What is so wrong with people knowing this about me? I’m Jill. This is me and this is who I am. This website just might show a different side than they’re used to seeing. More than they bargained for at times. But…I mean, is that so wrong?

fey

Probably. Not.

I’ll try to stop being and idiot asshole tomorrow.

this is me. and the dog.
they who have real names

 

quote photo credits here.